“You can’t plow straight if you keep looking back.” What
this Spiritual says in this line is true, and at the same time deceptively
problematic. If we do not look back, we cannot know how we got our hands on the
plow, in the first place. The path through this seeming dilemma is the oldest
strategy of Africana culture. You carry the past within you. Don’t look back. Look within. This is
also the meaning of the Eucharistic Liturgy of the Catholic traditions: “When
we eat this bread and drink this cup, we proclaim your death…until you come in
Glory.” It is also the essential ritual
question of every Passover observance:
“Why is this night different from all other nights?” “This is the night
when the Lord God brought us out of the land of bondage…”
Because we enact our defining moment, over and over and
over. And we are renewed and made stronger for the next part of the wilderness
wherein we find ourselves journeying. In a late-night conversation filled with
anger and anguish and desperation, one of Faulkner’s heroes says, “It is not
past…” The crumbling of that white hero’s sense of privilege led him to that
anguished cry. But the bone-marrow deep understanding of how we carry our
“infinite past” (to use Toni Morrison’s description) as a gift and not as
burden is what makes those who accept our African-American roots capable of
miracles of survival every day.
Now we stop for a moment in this “journey from can’t to can”
(Mari Evans), and we shudder with exhaustion as we do look back, at an entire
year (August 9, 2014) since Michael Brown was shot on a street in Ferguson,
Missouri, by then-police officer Darren Wilson.
Exhaustion. Weariness. Undigested sorrow. Wonderment and worry. More and
more young (and not as young) women and men have bled in streets and jail
cells, on porches, in cars. And the death of some have been recorded; while the
deaths of others have been subjected to the predictable, convoluted and twisted
narrative of “inconclusive proof of wrong-doing” – on the part of the one
wielding the instrument of death. The cry of the soul is “Why? And how long?
And, where are you, Delivering God?”
Keep our
hands on the plow? Why?
What do we
plant? And what do we hope to harvest?
Will there
be any following behind on this path, to be the harvesting promise of our
dreams?
And then I hear the singing: “I know my wings are gonna fit
me well/ I tried them on at the gates of Hell.”
So. We crawl and moan and mourn. And then we breathe the air
sent to us by our ancestors. And the twisted limbs and wounded hearts and
crippled hands push at the wall and we begin to lift up our eyes.
And what do we see?
The children marching, and chanting and clicking and typing
and recording and becoming the flesh-and-blood drums and grapevine of this space and
time. For them the prayer services and the “peaceful protests” and the marches
were angry, focused and unrelenting. More than at almost any time in our
American story of racial oppression and cultural domination, the collective power
to define the terms shifted; plucked from the lips of the predictable purveyors
of power, the words that mattered flew from the mouths of the children.
For as long as there have been photographs, there have been
records of lynchings and riots and other acts of domestic terrorism. Justified
by the laws that protected the inheritors of power, those who murderously rushed
into the streets of East St. Louis and Springfield, and Atlanta and Detroit and Tulsa in
the early days of the 20th century and who continue on today,
cloaked and disguised in costumes of respectability, have now been confronted
across the generations by the children who hold up their cameras and telephones
and demand that the contemporary patrollers and vigilantes and ad hoc militia be seen for what they are
and have always been.
Bob Moses, the quiet, determined, grace-filled sojourner for
justice, once said that United States history was written by the children and
young adults who were known as “runaways.” One of the enduring themes of the
documents called “slave narratives” is that once the writer/subject learned to
read and write, a strategy for self-liberation was quickly formed. These actual
“liberation narratives” were published to speed the process of liberation of
the thousands of others, left behind the veil. Frederick Douglass, Harriet Jacobs, Henry
Bibb, and so many others could not rest until every effort and every possible
resource was put into the freeing of this nation. No one could be a better face for this than
Harriet Tubman. Her return journeys to bring more and more from the wilderness
to the oases of freedom were followed by her service as a true “soldier of the
Cross” as she actively fought in the Civil War.
Yes.
That “Moses of her people” and the Moses of Mississippi in
the 1960’s put themselves into the middle of the host of those who began to
wade in the very troubled water. What Robert Hayden said of Tubman, we hear in
the full-throated cry of our young today:
“Rises from their anguish and their power….Mean mean mean to be free.”
(Hayden, “Runagate Runagate”)
In the valley, where there is darkness, on the mountain top
where there is fire and smoke; in the intersections of Ferguson, Cleveland,
Cincinnati, or Baltimore, where there are all of those conditions – there are our
children. So on the exact year-anniversary of the death of Michael Brown, the
blessing and charge has to be invoked by all of us who have been in the storm
so long: we must do more than weep and
worry. We must see in the young of this moment, the reincarnation of those who
wrestled control of slave ships; of those who slipped through brambles and
water and wilderness; of those who returned to be a Joshua of their moment. And
we must see -- and tell them -- that they are the light shining in this darkness. Fighting every
battle on their behalf we must demand that their lives be seen as the most
precious “bread from heaven” ever given to a wandering, desert people. We fight
to protect them. We struggle to understand them. We gift them with our
protection if possible, and with our gratitude in every possible circumstance.
They have been raised up as answers to our prayers.
The most wonderful of poets, Gwendolyn Brooks said this:
“In the
precincts of a nightmare all contrary
wild thick
scenery subdue.” (To Disembark,
“Another Preachment to Blacks", p. 60)
And she also
said this, and we all bear witness:
"It is
lonesome, yes. For we are the last of the loud.
Nevertheless,
live
Conduct your
blooming in the noise and whip of the whirlwind.“ (“The Second Sermon on the
Warpland”)
So, precious
gifts, one and all, hold on.
Dr. Kenneth Haller has a reflection on the past year that is compelling and beautifully rendered.
ReplyDeletehttps://medium.com/@kenhaller/our-long-climb-to-the-mountaintop-one-year-after-the-killing-of-michael-brown-5d48708530bb
Hold on, hold on -I love your writings, and it never cease to stimulate my little grey cells, (in the voice of Poirot) I did a workshop this past week in Chicago and though it was some times tough to get some of the youth that I was working with to focus on the " I can rather than I can't," and the joy that I saw in their faces when they realize that they not only could, they did. I asked them to draw from within, to trust their internal instinct and to not worry about the crowd and to hold on to their beliefs and desires for change. I hold on to the fact that I do make a difference with what I do regardless of how minute the change or how triumphant the change, I draw on my gift to try to help others to find theirs, or stimulate their gifts. many of us are holding on and helping to hold up, and to draw from the pass to engage in the present and forge ahead to the future-gaining strength from the ancestral spiritual pool.
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